Shhhh Don't tell I am a romantic........

Already half way through the first month of 2008 and I am yet to sit down and write anything of substance. I'm not saying random thoughts and rants don't hold substance but they are just not what I was striving to achieve here. Maybe striving and always setting the bar just a bit higher has been my problem all along. Just maybe I should let go of always attempting to maintain that image of acceptance from all and just be me here. Hhhmmm, if I am going to plan on just being me in here I better figure out who I am. It might be fun to just randomly share the real person I hide and share as I figure out who I am and who I want to be ( I would say when I grow up but I believe pushing 40 makes me kinda grown up) My new idea then for this site for me is to learn to be comfortable expressing myself openly and honestly without anxiety of worrying that I am not being what others expect.

So for my first insight to the real me..................

I am a romantic at heart. Really I am one that adores mushy, thoughtful gestures that come from the heart and not the wallet. Anybody can buy a gift but only special people give from the heart. One flower given to me with meaning means more to me than receiving a dozen roses on Valentine's Day. Yes, the gesture is nice for the dozen roses but the thoughtfulness of the meaning with the one flower wins my heart. I am such a sappy romantic that I will watch" Pretty Woman" every time I see it on T.V. and I cry every time I watch the movie "The Notebook". Could you image having the kind of love that movie expressed. Wonder if it is possible or if that only happens in the movies. A few gestures that I would consider to be romantic and have melted a special spot in my heart.

• note stating the words to the song "You are my Sunshine" left on the windshield of my car. (still wearing the sun charm I received shortly after this note)
• path of chocolate kisses with instructions to follow leading to a candlelight picnic.
• wrote me a journal of each days events while I was gone for seven days and gave it to me the night I got back in town.

There you have it I am a romantic! I don't really know why I hide that part of me from others except I am afraid that it is looked at as a weakness or afraid they might be able to use it against me later. Regardless of why I have shared it now. Are you a romantic at heart?